I call him "Neighbor Man." Here are the relevant facts. He:
-Purchased the house next door within a week of it going on the market for $179,000.Needless to say, I do not disapprove of any of this behavior; most of it is salutary and an eccentric neighbor trumps a boring one any day. But still, every day the mystery deepens.
-Lives alone.
-Drives a 4-door Audi, leather seats, the works.
-Has no obvious occupation, keeping odd hours and grooming habits.
-Has a dog that looks like Fozzi the Bear, only really really small. Like a foot tall.
-Frequents Rennie's.
-When walking his Fozzi dog in the winter, wears one of those wool coats with a print of a wolf howling at a giant moon.
-In good weather, opts for a tie-dye if wearing a shirt at all.
-Builds beer bottle shrines in his front window.
-Appears to be in his early 30's.
-Just mowed his front lawn; it was three feet high. Definitely no shirt that day.
-Often strolls out to his mailbox wearing only a towel, without compunction.
-Apparently has parents.
-Lately has taken to sitting in his front lawn, blasting Metallica and doing macrame. Perhaps this is why he mowed it. And after a while the Metallica gives way to Skynyrd.
To be continued . . .
Posted by FLOG at April 28, 2004 9:46 AM | TrackBack