October 13, 2005
Naked things afoot in my beloved Alvord Desert
So this evening I absently clicked on a Suicide Girls ad at Boing Boing -- this is just how techy-hip I was feeling today -- and, as per the tendency of one thing to lead to another, I soon found myself examining the free samples area. Whereupon I found this, which I have made moderately SFW; depends on whether big silly blue stars render an erotic image innocuous -- a question whose answer probably varies by workplace:
Now, I feel very safe in saying that this photo was taken on Oregon's Alvord Desert. The way the mountains in the background are arranged is what gives it away. The desert's proximity to Portland, a city increasingly known for its odd piercings, wallet chains, and shoe-polish hair -- the bread and butter of the Suicide Girls -- is circumstantial evidence.
Whenever I see this kind of thing going on at the Alvord Desert, be it in a SG spread or a cable-access music video for some local band, I find myself imagining the crew's journey out there. For a young, pierced hipster, driving to the Alvord Desert from Portland is 8 or 10 hours of traversing a hostile foreign country. Sure, out there they also like Pabst and mesh hats, but this is a commonality of the same form as the shared affection for the AK-47 among American hobby shooters and the Taliban. (Okay, that's an extreme analogy, but apt.)
In Harney County, I get dirty looks for wearing hiking boots and driving a Japanese pickup truck. On one trip out there, I was accompanied by a vegan, who left the lady at the Burns Safeway sandwich counter speechless by asking if the tapenade had any meat or dairy in it. The very air in Burns has meat and dairy in it. I can only imagine the reception our Suicide Girl here recieved.
Anyway, here are some other pics from the Alvord and vicinity. (These are safe for work.)
Welcome to Blog's rave review of the place is here. And, a true blast from the past: his re-enactment of the Book of Exodus, featuring a cast of beer bottles and set in and about the Alvord Desert and Steens Mountain, can be found here.
Burns' own Kellen Clemens' banner season is documented here.
Posted by FLOG at October 13, 2005 2:15 AMI remember thinking the same thing when that photo set popped up on the site. Did she and her boyfriend head out there by themselves? Or did they bring along multi-pierced bodyguards armed with machine guns covered in band stickers?
The site has branched out in recent years and they get sets from all over the world now. But, yeah, Oregon geography still appears every once in a while. The Doug Fir/Jupiter Hotel was in one girl's recent set.
Posted by: Brandon at October 13, 2005 1:49 PMI can't believe I clumsily Photoshopped bottles of beer into the fridge. I'm sure there was a good reason but I probably should have driven down to Safeway and bought a half-rack.
So that's why I never made it to the MoMA. I was never willing to go that little extra distance for my cheesy photo-art.
Posted by: Brandon at October 13, 2005 1:59 PMOh yeah, I hadn't noticed that. Photoshopping beers into your fridge: a truly Mormon thing to do.
Side note: A second ago I accidentally typed "photoshopping bears into your fridge," which is another thing entirely.
Side note on side note: Does anyone suspect that the entire market for Big Bear Malt Liquor is people who don't know how to spell "beer"?
Posted by: FLOG at October 13, 2005 2:17 PMNote: I fixed Brandon's first comment to reflect that it was indeed Brandon. I hope Brandon does not mind.
(Brandon, your IP is showing.)
Posted by: FLOG at October 13, 2005 2:19 PMI wrote that first one right after I cleared the cache on my office computer. It had deleted my "personal info." Speaking of which, I don't care if the whole world knows I once had a Suicide Girls account.
Anyhoo, maybe someone has the "Big Beer" name patented.
Posted by: Brandon at October 13, 2005 6:44 PM